Random musings- The flaws of many through the eyes of one

Second chances are overrated. Not everyone gets them, not everyone deserves them and not everyone values them. In most cases people tend to think that whatever they did wrong the first time, they will turn it around the second time. I don’t really get this concept. If it were supposed to go right, there wouldn’t have been the need for a second chance. But still lets give them the opportunity to give it a try. Yet the people who ask for a second chance at redemption don’t always realise it when they have it and are too quick to squander it away. The second thing that feels quite similar is the concept of forgiveness in today’s world. Admit it, you know it too, most people don’t really understand what that means. The ones who deserve it, are not really offered a chance and the ones who get it never really wanna accept it. What most people don’t get it that if you are truly forgiving someone, you don’t need to let it be known over and over again, coz if you do, you haven’t really either forgiven or forgotten. If you are really ready to forgive someone for whatever crime or mistake( apparently the dividing line has become too frail) that they committed, just forget about it and move on. Stop trying to make the other person feel that how grateful he should feel for getting your forgiveness. If its a gift, it needs to be a silent one. And for the people who are lucky enough to be blessed by someone’s true forgiveness, accept the gesture and move on. If the victim wanted you punished, you would face the judgement. Be glad that you aren’t, thank them and just make something better of it. There is no glory in rejecting a heartfelt forgiveness because that doesn’t do anyone any good. The other person anyways has let it go, the best you can do is not ruin something or someone else over this. Finally the last troubling thought that I can’t just let go is the difficulty or rather incapability of most of the people to accept certain, if not all things how they are. I get it, we constantly wanna try and make things better and that is what we devote most part of our lives to, but simple saying, there are several such instances or occurrences or circumstances that are simply beyond our control or rather’s beyond anyone’s control. Why do people still keep hammering at such things, trying over and over again to chip off anything from the existing structure and make it better(according to their personal belief). Yes its great to strive for excellence but frankly the mantra of acceptance in so many places works wonders. There is no joy in fretting over something that cannot change. Its just good logic to spend that thought or energy in something else, life has so much more to show, all you need to do is look closely with open eyes.

Acceptance is our only Salvation-Part 2

Contd from  http://armaan-goyal.blogspot.in/2015/04/acceptance-is-our-only-salvation-part-1.html



Now this is one of the most dangerous and devastating phases that most of the people have to go through, this denial mode. There is a very simple reason for its existence and an even simpler one for it being so dangerously devastating. The only reason most of us go into this denial mode is fear- the fear of loosing,  loosing something that we feel has been gained with such great efforts and perseverance and feeling that its loss can bring unbearable pain. So just to avoid that imaginary(or real, wouldn't comment on that yet) pain, we start to fool ourselves that this rendezvous with the truth is actually a lie and that the cloaked person and those fabricated feelings are the real deal. We fail to realise that this denial mode may extend that period a little longer, but something with a foundation so weak can never stand the test of time or distance. I don't mean to question anyone's devotion or passion for the person they love, but if u will, just ask yourself this question once and keep the answer to yourself but still do ask yourself once, "Is this what u actually wanted?" The answer I know will mostly be a no and there is nothing to be discouraged about.

There are two ways this answer can take you. Yes, the answer will be the same,"NO", yet it can come from two totally opposite lines of reasoning. What matters now is if you can truly understand whether your line of reasoning was the correct one and also if you have the strength to accept it and face the consequence. I ll go for the brighter side first. Is this what you actually wanted, "No, it isnt!" Now just ask yourself,"But is all that has changed worth it or are you just fooling yourself coz you are too weak to accept the loss?". Here is when the story changes. If you are certain that all that has changed has been an evolution into something that may be unpredictable yet beautiful and that you are prepared to face any challenges that may arise in the future due to this, just forget everything and give it your all with your eyes closed coz you are now in the clear. However, if the answer to the last question is on the lines of,"I don't really know, all I know is that too much has changed and I am not sure whether these changes are for good or not!" well, that's a cause for worry. Changes are inevitable, but if they aren't happening for good(or if you aren't sure) well they are happening for the bad. There is no sweeter way to put this. And that is how we people need to take this reality check.

You can't always plan everything. Well ya, you can, but there is no way to predict if everything will go as you planned it. These are matters of the heart, and the workings of this part of us have never been a slave to logic, there is never the same outcome with the same variables. Nothing I guess is as fickle as this heart and the way it functions. I may sound a bit too dramatic here but that is how I see it. So coming back to the second answer, if that is what you get as a response, its time to face the reality and accept the fate. This is the time to be smart and to put an end to something you have been sugar coating for yourself as well as the other person involved. And there is a very important reason behind that. For you, the reply may be the latter but maybe the one you love has the former answer. Now this is where the true test comes in and the outcome of this is never pretty. This is where most of the trouble will arise if you have come this far in analyzing where you stand.

This is the stage that you know its time to end it all. But now you feel that the person you have been devoted to for such a long time, how can you let them loose just like that, how will you make them understand, how will they take it. Well, this all is what this feeling of love entails. This strength that you need to sever the bond that you have been clinging to because you were too afraid. Love isnt always about who can hang on the longest, its about having the strength to do the right thing at the right time. If you end it all at this moment when you realize this you will be doing yourself and the other person a favour. Yes the other person will be hurt but look at it this way, isnt that better than prolonging it and heading towards an ugly end that you know will come sooner or later. Lets just say that you do cloak yourself from this reality and keep going the way everything was. All you are now doing is digging two graves and one thing I can assure you is that you will have to bury the other person with your own hands before you lay in yours. Yes, ending it now is accompanied with seemingly unbearable pain, but this one passes, sometimes quickly and mostly slowly, but it passes. Its all on you, your strength and your perseverance.

Love is not something too complicated, it just requires a lot of courage and strength and just one additional thing, Truth in your heart. You have that and everything else will flow on its own. The pain, the tears and everything else will pass if you can accept it all. Nothing lasts forever, so make it worthwhile till it exists in its true form. Well I personally use my mantra and feel that it can pull you through it all, whichever side of the story you are on. Acceptance is definitely my only salvation coz the things I cannot change I can only accept, be it love or the absence of it. But then again, what do I know, maybe love got to me as well!! ;)

Bhulne ka sawaal!!

Vo kehtein hai bhula do sab baatein puraani,
Koi samjhaaye hme, kaise bhula dein vo shaamein suhaani,
Kaise mita de apne dil se uski muskaan tk ki kahaani,
Jiske har nakhre pe ho gyi hmaari dhadkan deewani,
Jisko paane ko chahat me kr di ye dunia anjaani,
Aj vo h kehtein h bhula do sab yaadein puraani,
Hm to dil me chupa lenge sab lamhon ko, koi unse to pucho, kya hme yaad krke nai barsega unki aankhon se paani....
Hmse duuri ki tadap me kya nahi bahega unke naino se paani!!!!

Yaaron ki yaari aur gharwaalon ka pyaar

Itne barson me dunia dekhi, dunia me logon ka pyaar dekha,
Mohabbat me deewangi ka sirpe junoon sawaar dekha,
Jeete hue aashiq bhi dekhe aur logon ko ishq me jaate hue haar dekha,
Do dilon ki takraar aur unhi me hota karaar dekha,
Ik pal me hua inkaar aur umar bhar k baad ikraar dekha,
Dunia me maine bahot pyaar dekha,
Us pyaar me logon ko hote bekaar dekha,
Kahin bhi gya, kuch bhi dekha, dunia ko badlate aur mohabbat se bhare logon me aati nafrat ki dewaar ko dekha...
Sab badal jaata hai, sab reh jaata hai peechey, ye sach hai,
Maine phir bhi kabhi kabhi na yaaron ki yaari se jaata khumaar dekha,
Aur bas ma ki aankhone me pyaar aur papa k dil me base guroor ko sada barkaraar dekha...

sawaali raat ka ek khyaal

Main andheron me uski pukaar ki taraf yun badhta chla gya,
Subha hui to abhaas hua, hum jiske liye jahaan chod aaye, usne apna aashiyan kahin aur bna lia...
Main kinaare pe khada uske aane ki rah dekhta reh gya,
Aankh khuli to ehsaas hua k kinaare to bahot peechey chod aaye, usne to hmaare maqbare pe apna jahaan basa lia....

Use bewafa mat kaho, Taqleef hoti hai

Mere dost mere ghum ko dekhkr use bewafa keh dete hai,
Main kehta hu mat kaho use kuch bhi, taqleef hoti hai...
Mere dost mere ghum ko dekhkr use bewafa keh dete hai,
Main kehta hu mat kaho use kuch bhi, taqleef hoti hai...
Vo nahi chahte hume ab isme kuch kasoor to hmaara bhi rha hoga,
Uski bewafai ki vajah me hmaari kamion ka bhi to kuch hissa hoga,
Mere aansuon ko dekhkr ye use zaalim bhi keh dete hain,
Uske liye zindagi chodi di hai, main kehta hu meri aashiqi ko bewafa mat kaho,is tuute hue dil me bahot taqleef hoti hai....
Maine to beintehaa mohabbat ki hai unse, mere jeene ki vajah ko bewafa mat kaho, bahot taqleef hoti hai...

Raat se subha ka safar

Raat ki chandni ko bhedkr subha k suuraj ne aahat ki hai,
Ye aankhein abhi bhi unke interzaar me khuli hain...
Taaron bhre aasman me panchiyon ne ronak ki hai,
Ye baatein abhi bhi unke zikr pe ruki hain...
Tanha sunsaan raahon par bhi kadmon ne harkat ki hai,
Ye saansein abhi bhi unki mehak se judi hain...
Ae waqt ke pehredaaro, kuch to ishaara de do, ab to murjhaaye phoolon par bhi bhawron ne dastak di hai,
Na jaane kyu jaage hain hum, ab to ilm bhi nahi ki zinda bhi hain, ya fir ye dhadkanein unke jaane pe thami hain....

Khudko samet rha hu main...

Apne sapno k bikhre hue tukde samet rha hu mai,
Koi hawa ka jhonka inhe uda na le jaaye...
Apne beete hue lamhon ko samet rha hu main,
Koi waqt k samandar me inhe baha na le jaaye...
Apne bichade doston ko samet rha hu main,
Koi nafrat ki aag me inhe jala na le jaaye...
Ye zindagi bahot choti si hai, to apne jeene k iraade samet rha hu main,
Darr Lagta hai is baat ka, koi maut ka saudagar inhe mujhse chura na le jaaye...
Koi mujhse mere jeene ki vajah chura na le jaaye....

Ik pari ko dekha hai...

Aaine me utarkar uske aks ko dekha hai,
maine dil me utarkar uski mohabbat ko dekha hai,
uske hothon se fisalkar uski muskaan ko dekha hai,
aankhon me rehkar uske aansuon ko dekha hai,
ye koi khwaab nahi hai,main sach kehta hu,
maine isi zameen par ik pari ko dekha hai...

 

 

Dua me samakar uski,maine khuda ko dekha hai,
raaton me uske haseen sapnon ko dekha hai,
uske dil ki gehraai me ek achhai ko dekha hai,
uske chehre ke noor me uski khudai ko dekha hai,
koi kissa ya kahaani nahi,main sach kehta hu,
maine zameen par utri ik pari ko dekha hai...

 

 

Maine ik chandni raat me uski tanhaayi ko dekha hai,
uski baaton me ek bachhe ki sachhai ko dekha hai,
uske gusse me maine ik bebasi ko dekha hai,
aur mohabbat me uski maine ik jannat ko bhi dekha hai,
apne haathon ki lakeeron ko dekhkr yakeen nahi hota,
par sach kehta hu,maine apne naseeb me us pari ko dekha hai,
maine zameen par aayi us pari ko dekha hai.....

Chaand ki Khwahish

Aj na jaane kyu guzre hue lamhon ne dastak di hai,
Maine itihaas ke vo panne uthaane ki himmat ki hai,
In harfon me se meri mohabbat ki khushboo aati hai,
Aur ye mehak meri aankhon ko kuch nam sa kr jaati hai,
Un dino ki ek alag h subha hua krti thi,
Tujhse bas ek mulakaat ki dua har dhadkan meri bhrti thi,
In aankhon se is rooh ko jb bhi tera deedar hota tha,
Har baar se jaada, kuch aur zaada tujhse pyaar hota tha,
Tere chle jaane k baad ye nadaan dil sochta tha,
Tujhe saamne aakr izhaar krne ki himaat khud me tatolta tha,
Us waqt bas is ek hi baat k ehsaas se thoda sukuun mann me khilta,
Chaand ko bas dekhr khush rehna pdta hai, ye kisi bhi insaan ko apne naseeb me nahi milta....

Dosti aur Mohabbat

Log kehte hain,dosti aadmi ko jeena aur mohabbat use marna sikhati hai...
Sach hai,vo mohabbat hi hai jo aadmi ko saatve aasmaan pr le jaati hai,
Par vo dosti hi hai jo vahan se girkr tuutne par bhi use uthna sikhati hai...
Vo mohabbat hi hai jo aankhon me kabhi chamak to kabhi nami laati hai,
Aur vo dosti hi hai jo un aansuon ko ponchna sikhati hai...
Vo mohabbat h hai jisme aadmi sab kuch luta deta hai,
Aur vo dosti hi to hai jo use har cheez ki ahmiat btati hai...
Jeevan k do pehlu hai dono,ek na ho to dusri kaam aati hai...
Aur ek bhi na ho to zindagi bematlab ho jaati hai...
Par jise dono mil jaaye,uski zindagi to kya,masha allah,maut bhi haseen ho jaati hai...​

Acceptance is our only Salvation-Part 1

The concept of love is tricky. Most of the people who know it seem to think that they get it, that they understand it but that is a mere illusion because it is what actually gets to them, to all of them, sooner or later. All the people who have loved know the pain of losing. There is hardly anyone I have come across who has loved and not lost. Without the pain of losing, the joy of love is really hard to savour. The feeling of knowing that someone out there loves the things you do, the way you do them, the reasons you do them and in turn feeling the same way about someone is seemingly one of the most ethereal forms of emotion that we people get a chance to experience but this does not come that easy, it has certain harsh realities associated with itself just like there is always a terms and conditions apply clause in every agreement you come across. 

The biggest mistake we humans do is take this fact as a given that if we love someone like there is no one else in the world but them, they will do it too for us. Well I guess this is the mistake most humans make and the reason we do this is simple, when we care for someone, we tend to feel that we deserve the same care from them. This is not what love entails. Love does not mean that if you give, you are bound to get. It simply implies that you can give all you want but there is no point in expecting the same. If that were the case, the world would be an ideal place with no space for any kind of sorrow or grief. When we expect the reciprocation of our love from someone, all we are doing is binding ourselves to the attached sadness because this will always be uncertain. The person you love may not even be aware of it and even if aware, each of us function in a different way so there is no telling what or whom the other person admires. That is the reason I believe that acceptance is our only salvation.

 

To love someone is a joy to feel and to be loved back is the eternal bliss everyone talks about. But the other mistake people make is that they feel that Love in their hearts will last forever and nothing is powerful enough to make it go away. That is something that needs correction and the sooner the better. The problem with some of us is that we bind ourselves to this feeling for a lifetime and we get so used to telling ourselves that we love someone that even if actually we hate everything about them at some point later in time, our heart will never accept this simply because it does not identify this emotion as a possible consequence. The reason behind this is cloaking. Every human being puts a cloak on to hide his true self, not just from the world, but themselves at times. That is why there are times when we fail to identify ourselves, let alone someone else. This cloak prevents us from knowing the true image of a person and we begin to love this perceived image, this false persona that does not exist in reality. Now when you get to actually know someone from close quarters, this outer cloak begins to fade away and we begin to understand that it was all a lie. That is when that feeling tends to diminish as well and that is exactly when we go into denial mode....to be contd....